Following Jesus is scary ...without our friend

Following Jesus is scary ...without my friend.

But having Him live in me takes the scary out of it.

When my kids were little and there was scary talk of ghosts usually around the Halloween season, I always reminded them that our good friend Holy Ghost was stronger than all of the other ghosts and he lived inside of us. We never needed to be afraid.

How do you keep following Jesus when there seems to be so many scary contradictions and unexpected turns in the road? You just start to get comfortable in the journey, you think that you are beginning to understand and then He takes you down an unexpected side road….a short cut through uncharted territory. I am beginning to understand that understanding is over rated.

I have to first get past the nagging question of His love for me. Once that is settled I can begin to be OK with the turns in the road and Trust Him on the journey.

I understand firsthand the problem the disciples had in following Him and believing. Following Jesus is hard. Our understanding and perspective is so limited.

-Why, when everyone was already inebriated turn more water into wine?

-Why didn’t Jesus rescue His friend John? He healed the sick, raised the dead, walked on water, multiplied the loaves and fishes and calmed the sea but where was he when his cousin was in jail and about to be beheaded?

-Why did Jesus refer to the Samaritan woman as a dog when she was asking for help?

-Why did Jesus ask the disciples if they had a sword and when they responded, “yes” say that one was enough and then when Peter chose to use it rebuke him for it?

-What were the disciples to think when Jesus spoke in such ridiculous terminology like “eat my flesh and drink my blood” with no explanation?

-What were they to think when known prostitutes fawned all over him and the sinners partied and yucked it up in His presence?

-It is easy to understand why the disciples were furious over the wasting of the pricey and precious ointment on Jesus, which could have been sold for a good sum and the money given to the poor. His excuse was “the poor you have with you always”? Why should they not be offended? He had just given such a convicting sermon about justice, addressing the way we treat the poor “as much as you have or have not done it unto the least of these you have done or not done it unto me”? Why was He now exempt from this wasteful extravagance on Himself?

-Why was He so scary to follow in the moment?


I understand the predicament Judas was in. He saw and admired so much in the Lord. He followed Him intrigued, was in His inner circle, weighed every word that came out of His mouth. He was compelled by the miracles and physically and emotionally moved by the excitement and anticipation in the crowds. Jesus provided the inspiration for his dreams and personal aspirations. He knew he was connected to the wagon that would not only topple the existing domination and subjugation by the Romans but would catapult him to places he could never have risen to on His own.

I have been in his shoes, intoxicated with prestige and power, convinced I too was connected to the wagon that would become the fulfillment of all of our dreams and aspirations. And it was God that led me there with scripture and verse. I’ve been in his shoes when God didn’t show up on time…when He was late and I went it on my own. I’ve walked the long dark valley of depression when a wet blanket covered all of my dreams and aspirations. I’ve been down the road of disillusionment and terror.

I get the fury in the disciples and the reasoning behind Judas’s decision to expose Jesus, for good hopefully. It was time to get on with the program, to hasten the day where He would rise to the anticipated expectations. King of the Kingdom in which all of their hopes and dreams would be fulfilled. or worst case scenario, exposed as a fraud. He had to know the truth and this would be Jesus doing or undoing. I get it.

What happens in your life when you are delighting in Him and following in His steps and:

All hell breaks loose?

He fails to show up on time?

The promise He gave you turns into saw dust?

You lose your wealth or position, your health, your house, wife and or kids?

You are disillusioned to the core?

What happens when the water is up to your neck and rising and he hasn’t shown up? Do you really think it would have been easier to believe if you had been back there with Him and the disciples? Do you think having Him physically with you right here right now would make things easier?

He said on the night He was betrayed “In the world you will have tribulation, it's going to get scary, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world”

How does this help?

Well this helps in every way imaginable… better than life itself..having Him in me makes all of the difference.

Here is the promise He made to His disciples and to me the night He was betrayed. “I am with you, but will be in you.” You know what is better than having Him with me right here right now? Having Him in me! The disciples had Him with them and it wasn’t enough. Not until the day of Pentecost did it all come together, and only on the day of Pentecost will it all come together for you and me as well.

What could be better than having him with me right here right now? He said having Him in me would be better and I for one am beginning to get it. It really is better.

What if Jesus lived in me?

If He lived in me I would never need fear again. That is the promise He made. He promised the Holy Ghost. The good news is My friend, Holy Ghost lives in me and will never leave me! I am never and will never be alone! He promised never to leave me, never to leave me alone. And when I'm scared and lean back into his presence I can follow Him, even when nothing around me makes sense.

He never promised me a rose garden. He never promised that I would understand. He never promised no dead ends. He promised His presence not just with me but also in me; His presence, His righteousness, His peace, His joy in the Holy Ghost. My friend Holy Ghost lives in me. It no longer matters if it rains, pours or floods. The water may be up to my neck and rising but I am OK because I am never, never alone!

I don’t need all of the answers. I don’t need to understand. He loves me. I trust Him. I am in Him and He is in me. And that is what takes the scary out of following. I am learning to live loved, to enjoy the friendship that is mine.

There is no formula. Go figure. Instead He is offering friendship. And that'’s the good news.

2 Cor.13- The amazing grace of the master Jesus Christ, the extravagant love of God, the intimate friendship of the Holy Ghost, be with you.